{"id":2288,"date":"2019-02-04T00:00:31","date_gmt":"2019-02-04T00:00:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/fdfamilylaw.wpenginepowered.com\/?p=2288"},"modified":"2023-04-26T16:25:49","modified_gmt":"2023-04-26T16:25:49","slug":"co-parenting-after-divorce","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/fdfamilylaw.com\/co-parenting-after-divorce\/","title":{"rendered":"Co-Parenting After Divorce"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Co-parenting the children is an essential part of a healthy divorce.\u00a0 You and your soon to be ex may no longer have much, if anything, in common besides the children.\u00a0 However, if it is at all possible, parenting the children as a team, rather than as individuals with completely different rules and different expectations, provides your children stability and security.\u00a0 Co-parenting can be hard after a divorce.\u00a0 This is especially true if your marriage ended due to infidelity, a betrayal of trust, or was not something both parties wanted.\u00a0 It can also be a challenge if you don\u2019t trust your ex\u2019s parenting abilities, are stressed about your financial situation, or have difficulties communicating.\u00a0 Understanding and committing to co-parenting, however, can be a wonderful gift for your children.<\/p>\n<h2>Understanding Co-Parenting After Divorce<\/h2>\n<p>Co-parenting requires both parents play an active role in their child\u2019s lives on a consistent basis.\u00a0 This ensures a close relationship with each parent.\u00a0 Studies show that strong relationships with each parent reduce the child\u2019s anxiety as well as the potential for depression.\u00a0 Each set of parents can work out their own definition of co-parenting as the divorce progresses or at a later time.\u00a0 What works for some parents may not work for others.<\/p>\n<p>Co-parenting can involve making shared decisions about education, religious training, approaches to parenting, or discipline.\u00a0 Particularly with families where the children see both parents each week, being consistent about enforcing bedtimes, homework routines, chores, or sports or music practice provides children with stability and the knowledge their parents are on the same page.<\/p>\n<h2>Benefits of Co-Parenting After Divorce<\/h2>\n<p>Studies show children are more likely to flourish in divorces where parents are committed to co-parenting.\u00a0 Benefits include:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Consistency: Children know what is expected of them.\u00a0 They also know what to expect regardless of which parent they will be staying with that night.<\/li>\n<li>Mental and emotional stability: Children who see their parents fighting or being disrespectful of the other parents\u2019 rules are more likely to develop issues such as anxiety and depression.<\/li>\n<li>Learning about healthy relationships: parents who commit to the task of raising the children together provide a healthy example of commitment which gives the children a model to build and maintain relationships with others in the future.<\/li>\n<li>Teaching problem solving and perseverance: children who see their parents work together to solve problems are more likely to learn to solve problems effectively and persevere themselves.<\/li>\n<li>Providing a sense of security. Even if both parents are thrilled with the prospect of divorcing, children often need a period of adjustment.\u00a0 When they are secure in the love of each parent and do not feel they have to \u201cpick sides,\u201d they are able to adjust to the new living situation more quickly.\u00a0 They also have better self-esteem.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>Shifting Your Paradigm \u2013 From Partners to Co-Parents After Divorce<\/h2>\n<p>One challenge of co-parenting is that there was a prior relationship which may or may not have been based on trust, mutual respect, or shared parenting approaches.\u00a0 Becoming co-parents is a process, not an event.\u00a0 Redefining the relationship takes effort and commitment, as well as practice.\u00a0 However, over time, adults committed to co-parenting can develop a new relationship, based on their mutual commitment to raising the children.<\/p>\n<h2>Co-Parenting as a Business Relationship<\/h2>\n<p>Some parents approach the process of co-parenting by considering their commitment to mutually raising the children as a business partnership.\u00a0 They speak with their co-parent as they would a colleague.\u00a0 They use a polite tone, conveying respect and neutrality.\u00a0 Co-parents avoid asking personal questions that are none of their business, just as they would with a colleague.\u00a0 Co-parents focus their conversations on the children and their needs.\u00a0 While a married couple, one or both parties may have communicated demands.\u00a0 As co-parents, many people find making requests more effective.\u00a0 This simple act can serve as a subtle reminder to both parties their relationship is now a joint effort to raise the children and nothing more.<\/p>\n<h2>Practicing Co-Parenting After Divorce<\/h2>\n<p>When couples first begin to co-parent, it may not feel natural.\u00a0 One way to ease into co-parenting is to focus on the transition of the children from one household to the other.\u00a0 Help your child plan for this transition.\u00a0 Remind them of the upcoming schedule change.\u00a0 Discuss whether they need to bring anything with them and help them pack.\u00a0 Many families find the custom of taking the child to the other parent sends a positive message. \u00a0Taking just a minute to greet the child\u2019s other parent similarly sends the children a positive message.<\/p>\n<h2>Making Decisions as Co-Parents After Divorce<\/h2>\n<p>There will be times when one parent needs to make a decision, such as regarding emergency medical care.\u00a0 In that situation, keeping the other co-parent informed as soon as practicable is a must.\u00a0 Parents can accomplish this with a phone call, a text, a co-parenting app, or other mutually agreed on form of communication.<\/p>\n<p>Other times, co-parenting will be done in tandem.\u00a0 For example, decisions about the children\u2019s education rarely require a speedy decision.\u00a0 Co-parents should be able to discuss education decisions and come to a consensus.\u00a0 If possible, co-parents should attend their child\u2019s school conferences together.\u00a0 Additionally, both should attend sporting events, the school play, recitals and the like.\u00a0 Co-parents don\u2019t have to sit next to each other.\u00a0 However, if possible, they both should be there.<\/p>\n<h2>Considering Divorce or Have Other Family Law Needs?<\/h2>\n<p>If you are considering divorce, would like to discuss a modification of child custody, or think a child support payment should be increased or decreased, contact the attorneys at\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/fdfamilylaw.com\/\" rel=\"noopener\">Fait &amp; DiLima<\/a>.\u00a0 Our firm works with couples and families with divorce and family law needs. \u00a0Our team of family law professionals will work with you through every step in the process.\u00a0 Contact the firm today to discuss your family law needs at\u00a0<a href=\"tel:+1301-251-0100\">(301) 251-0100<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Co-parenting the children is an essential part of a healthy divorce.\u00a0 You and your soon to be ex may no longer have much, if anything, in common besides the children.\u00a0 However, if it is at all possible, parenting the children as a team, rather than as individuals with completely different rules and different expectations, provides [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":16,"featured_media":5006,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[18],"tags":[36],"class_list":["post-2288","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog","tag-divorce"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Co-Parenting After Divorce | Rockville, MD | Call 301-251- 0100<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Learn how to co-parent after divorce with the help of our experienced family law attorneys in Rockville, MD. 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